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What is Sex?

What is sex?

As long as it is consented to and enjoyable, sex can be whatever you want it to be! It can be masturbating, sexting, oral sex, anal sex, vaginal sex, etc.; in other words, it is up to you to define what sex is. Below, we’ve provided some information on a few different types of sex. Sex isn’t one size fits all - you need to figure out what works for you and what doesn’t!

When should you have sex?

There is no “right” time to start engaging in sexual activities. Whether you choose to be sexually active right now or choose to wait, you should know about the different aspects of sex!

Benefits of Sex

Whether you are with a partner or not sexual pleasure can have a variety of health benefits! Orgasms release feel-good hormones that can improve your mood and lower stress levels. Other health benefits include better sleep, higher self-esteem, a stronger immune system, and way more!

Can Sex Be Awkward?

Sex is not exactly what movies and television shows portray it to be. Whether it is a not-so-smooth transition to a new position, a strange noise, or a release of bodily fluids, parts of sex can be awkward and that is totally okay! Try not to let something natural and normal ruin your experience, even better, try to see the sexy side to them! Being comfortable with your body and everything that comes along with it will allow you to enjoy sex more.


The scientific name of queefing is vaginal flatus. A queef is a sound air makes when it gets displaced or otherwise pushed out of your vagina and it is normal for the air to get pushed out by coughing, laughing, straining, or sexual activity. Queefing can be caused by inserting fingers, sex toys, penises, tampons, etc into a vagina (anything that pushed air into the vagina) It is TOTALLY normal! Most people with a vagina will experience it at some point. Some positions are believed to increase the chances of queefing.

Sex Drive

In simple terms, your sex drive is your desire to be sexual or engage in sexual activity. You might be mentally excited (i.e. having sexual fantasies) and/or physically excited (i.e. erect penis or clitoris). Your sex drive changes as you go through different life stages. Everyone’s sex drives are different too! Some people may not experience any sex drive. There is no need to compare your sex drive to a friend or a partner. Just like sex isn’t one-size-fits-all, sex drives vary too, and one drive isn’t better than the other. While sex drive ranges, there are some different factors that can impact your sex drive. These include, but are not limited to:

If you are particularly concerned about any of the above impacting your sex drive, talk to your doctor about it!


Foreplay is used to increase sexual excitement and can include a number of activities. During foreplay, it is important to be open with your partner about your desires and boundaries.

Non-Penetrative Sex

This is a broad category of sexual activities. Non-penetrative sex can include fingering (without insertion of the digits), handjobs, cunnilingus, and oral stimulation of the anus. Whether you want to call any of these activities sex or not is totally up to you! Remember sex has no objective/definite definition.


The use of fingers to stimulate a partner's genitals. Most commonly, fingering involves the stimulation of the clitoris and can involve insertion into the vagina.


The use of hands to stimulate a partner’s penis.

Oral Sex

Oral sex is defined as the stimulation of the penis, vulva or anus with the mouth (specifically lips and tongue). It can go by different names, such as “blowjobs” for oral stimulation of the penis or “eating someone out” for oral stimulation of the vulva. While there is no risk of pregnancy with oral sex, there is a risk of STIs, so wearing a condom or dental dam is important (especially if you and your partner have not been tested recently).

Penetrative Sex

Just like non-penetrative sex, penetrative sex can include a number of sexual activities. Examples might be: fingering (with insertion of the digits), and insertion of a sex toy or penis into the mouth, vagina, or anus. It is important to remember to use protection during most types of penetrative sex to prevent transmission of sexually transmitted infections and/or pregnancy. In the case of penetration by sex toys, make sure to clean the toys before and after usage following the proper instructions provided after purchase.

Vaginal Sex

Vaginal sex is defined as the insertion of the penis into the vagina.

Anal Sex

Penetration of the anus with a sex toy or penis.

*Stay tuned for tips/more information for each sexual activity coming soon!

Sources: Self, Lioness, Planned Parenthood