Sex in the Digital Age
Sex has evolved with technology. Intimacy can be expressed through different platforms like Snapchat, iMessage, Facetime, etc. with nudes and sexting. Between consenting adults, sexting can be a positive aspect of a healthy relationship!
What is Sexting?
Good question! Sexting is quite literally the words “sex” and “texting” combined. It can consist of sending nudes, detailed sexual messages back-and-forth, videos of people doing sex acts, etc.
If you are under the age of 18, it is illegal for minors to send nudes of themselves EVEN to other minors because under the criminal code it is child porn. In addition, it is illegal to knowingly share someone’s nude photos without their consent at any age.
I’m Not Sure if I Want To Do This…
If contemplating sending a nude consider if you are being pressured into it:
- ✿ Do you feel like you owe someone something?
- ✿ Are they repeatedly asking you for a pic?
- ✿ If you don’t send one, are you worried about your relationship with this person?
- ✿ Are you being bribed?
- ✿ Do you feel threatened to send a pic?
Consent is JUST as important for sexting as it is for physical sex. It is NEVER ok to pressure or guilt someone into sending nudes. If you feel pressured by someone to send explicit photos of yourself, blocking them can help in order to keep yourself safe.
Is it Ok to Ask Someone for a Nude?
Yes, it can seem natural to ask for nudes if you’re talking to someone or in a relationship, however, if you are asking someone for the first time you need to consider:
- ✿ How is this person going to feel after I ask?
- ✿ Is it legal? How old are both of you?
- ✿ Are you pressuring this person? Make sure you aren’t coming across as aggressive.
I Sent a Nude and Now I’m Worried About What Will Happen to it… What Do I Do?
Have no fear! There are several different things you can do! You can...
- ✿ Ask for the photo to be deleted.
- ✿ Don’t reply to people if they taunt or threaten you.
- ✿ Talk to a trusted friend or family member.
- ✿ Report what has happened.
- ✿ Realize it is not your fault.
How can I protect myself and my images?
- ✿ Have a discussion beforehand: This discussion can be casual! If you’re newly sexting with someone or if you just feel uncomfortable, discuss your expectations, boundaries, rules, etc. with the person you are talking to. Before you send a nude, you can say “Hey, this is for you only” or “Please don’t show this to anyone, delete it right away.” Make sure you trust this person. If you don’t know the person that well or at all, realistically it isn’t smart to assume they won’t do anything with your images. From a privacy standpoint, it might help to be sober when you sext someone. I know you people get warm, fuzzy, and flirty when drunk, however, you may wake up the next morning with a text you might regret.
- ✿ Know your phone applications inside and out: If you are concerned with images being saved to your camera roll without you knowing, you can go to the app’s settings and deactivate the screengrab. In addition, turn off your iCloud or Google Photos if you are concerned with your photos being backed up, especially if you share an account with family members or other people.
- ✿ Make sure your phone has tough security: There are few things you can do to prevent hackers. Make sure to change your passwords frequently, keep your apps up to date, and don’t recycle or use the same passwords!
Sources: Abuse Online, Sexting and Sending Nudes
